Thursday, September 6, 2012

Despair Grows In My Garden

I suspect that everyone hates weeds and that at the top of your list is the weed you deal with most often. I have plenty to choose from but my most hated weed is one that really falls under that annoyingly apt line "A weed is a flower in the wrong spot."

The flowers in the wrong spots in my life are Palm seedlings from just one tree in my neighbor's yard. 

They grow everywhere with no encouragement from me.  They sprout up through rocks.

These rocks border the walkway to my front door.  This area gets no water and yet the seedlings thrive.

And through mulch.

A fresh layer of mulch does nothing to keep the seedlings from reaching for the light.

And where nothing else grows.

I'm amazed at how densely these grow.  Again, all these seedlings from a single tree next door!

They even grow where other things can no longer grow.

When I cut down a tree in the front yard, the shade-loving Baby's Tears and Lace Fern gave up the ghost.

On the plus side, they are fairly easy to grab with bare fingers and pull out.  

Sisyphus photo from Wikipedia
But it's a Sisyphean task and I am no longer feeling up to the challenge.  I try to get on my hands and knees every other weekend and take a whack at these, but after a half hour of this nonsense my thoughts turn from the good and pleasant "connecting with nature" thoughts that gardening inspires to "what did I ever do to deserve this kind of treatment?" 

Inevitably, I'll have to rise from my weeding crouch and stretch my legs and aching back before they all seize and cause me to convulse on the ground like an overturned turtle.  While I stretch, I'll survey the results of my labor and that's when I'll see that for every hundred seedlings I pulled there are another hundred that I missed.  This is no way to spend a life.

And that's when I get existential.  Does anyone else even care if there are palm seedlings where they shouldn't be?  Does the FedEx guy notice them on his way up to the front door?  Do my neighbors think I've let the yard go to hell if I miss a few hundred seedlings?  Does any of this matter, you know, in the long run?  By believing myself to be a "good gardener" and all that entails, am I consigning myself to existential despair since the evidence will always show that I am not what I think I am?  And if I am not what I think I am, what am I? 

"That's a good question," I'll say to myself.  And then I'll go back to picking flowers in the wrong spots while I give the answer some more thought.


13 comments:

  1. 'Convulse on the ground like an overturned turtle'; my what an accurate description of my usual posture in the garden!

    And the weeds that are flowers or vice versa, I choose to believe all gardeners have them. I know we do, in fact there's one interloper slowly but surely taking over our lawn as I write this, namely Creeping Charlie. We've been there, done that with the pulling the stuff out but it is a losing battle.

    At least my neighbors aren't seeding my yard with the pest; I don't know what I'd do about that. If the weeds are coming up in your stone borders and there's no other plants there you want to keep, did you ever try a weedburning torch? It's basically a propane tank with a long extension wand with which to roast and toast unwanted vegetation. (Use with caution around anything you want to keep, such as prized plants and/or your abode, lol) We use one here and it's a hoot.

    I dare the FedEx guy to giggle at you while you're brandishing a weed torch. You're definitely a 'good gardener' Chad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have thought about those propane torches before but since most of my weeds are in and around other vegetation I have never made the leap to get one. It would be handy for the rocks and for the weeds that grow in the crack between the sidewalk and our driveway. I have tried pouring boiling water on them before with mixed results. It works but it's pretty labor intensive.

      As for my neighbor's involvement in the pest-spreading I can't hold it against the current resident. Since I bought my house about 10 years ago there have been at least 5 people to move in and out of that house. The most recent occupant is just a young kid (maybe 23 or 24) who took advantage of the previous owner's misfortunes and bought the house as a short sale. He can't even afford a lawn mower of his own yet so asking him to remove a 60 foot palm tree probably wouldn't be met with a lot of enthusiasm.

      Delete
  2. Hi Chad, I just found your blog! It is always nice to "meet" another California gardener. I can completely relate to your post. In my yard millions of Washingtonia palm seeds sprout up, too, and they seem to do it on a daily basis. I have no solution for this problem other than that I would like to express my sympathy. I guess it is just like with Sisyphus we have to keep going if we like it or not ;-).
    Christina

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Christina. It is nice to meet another California gardener. Thanks for taking the time to introduce yourself and leave a comment. I appreciate the sympathy too.

      Delete
  3. That's a lot of seeds! Maybe you could start selling them! Or get a big fan and blow those seeds back into your neighbor's yard! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think someone else once suggested potting them up and selling them sometime and that probably would be the best way to "make lemonade". I just haven't gotten around to it. Maybe I should start saving some nursery pots and go for it though. It's not like I would have to give them much care along the way.

      Now you've got me thinking . . .

      Delete
  4. I do this every spring with seedlings from our hornbeam tree. I cut as many seed pods off the tree as possible in the fall to diminish the task and I still find seedlings all summer. Either convince your neighbor to cut down his tree or keep pulling them. Cultivating and selling them would be a nice reward fro your efforts since the seeds are free. At least you would feel compensated for your efforts.

    ReplyDelete
  5. That one weed I don't have to worry about here. Even our warmest winter would take care of the problem I'm sure. Maybe you an find away to freeze them out.

    ReplyDelete
  6. When plants want to grow, they grow! The seedlings coming through the rocks are determined, aren't they?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Palm seedlings? If these are the variety that develop into pina coladas I would let them be. Personally.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would too, but so far no pina coladas. Only anguish.

      Delete
  8. Now is this what I call the California Weed Palm, Washingtonia robusta? You have my wholehearted sympathy. Hate the things, hate hate hate. I'm pulling seedlings from my neighbor's weedy blankity-blank palms daily as well. You are Not Alone. They are Pure Evil. Never give in! Never! Do not submit! Stay strong and carry on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I believe it is the Washingtonia robusta. Honestly, I've never despised any weed more than I do this tree.

      Delete